Uncomfortably Numb
So remember when I said that a cold would be striking me soon? Well, today's the day (or yesterday was the night?). I woke up feeling terrible, there was no pain, I was receding--a distant ship's smoke on the horizon--light was only coming through in waves, their lips were moving but I couldn't hear what they were saying... when I was a child, I had a fever and my hands felt just like two balloons... now I've got the feeling once again, I can't explain, you would not understand... this is not how I am!
Okay, so it wasn't that bad (I couldn't breathe, but that was about it... oh, and instead of my hands feeling like two balloons, my head felt like one balloon). If you're wondering why all that sounds so familiar, it's because it's a cheap modification of Comfortably Numb. Good song. Anyway, at first I thought it was a hangover, but then after a while I noticed I did have fever, so unless it was the worst hangover ever it wasn't. I took a pill and went back to bed (and, of course, drank some water). Now I've woken up and I feel much better... but that doesn't mean I feel good at all. but well, whatever, I had it coming.
I hope it's a cold, though. Hope it isn't some weird thing I contracted while using the toilet... or bird flu! Ah, couldn't be the latter... haven't had chicken since I was in Valencia... plus, I'm not a bird, and Tiny's not around here, so it's all safe.
Anyway, I've slept through the whole day, not having anything to eat, and then the next thing I know is I'm feeling a bit wet. Hmm. Again. WTF? I open my eyes, only to basically feel something around my face (not sure of what it was) and then I see Steve, standing by the door, aiming that fucking water machine gun. The bastard squirt me while I was asleep! He wanted me to go to the Chelsea match with him, but I was just too fucked to go anywhere. It took me a while to get him to leave me alone, but once I got hold of his gun it was quite easy. The cunt.
Yep, I know the last paragraph sounds like quite a sexual encounter, but I really can't be bothered to change it, so enjoy. I just want to say I didn't purposefully write it like that, it just came out. Damn, this fever is making me hallucinate... cool!
Okay, so it wasn't that bad (I couldn't breathe, but that was about it... oh, and instead of my hands feeling like two balloons, my head felt like one balloon). If you're wondering why all that sounds so familiar, it's because it's a cheap modification of Comfortably Numb. Good song. Anyway, at first I thought it was a hangover, but then after a while I noticed I did have fever, so unless it was the worst hangover ever it wasn't. I took a pill and went back to bed (and, of course, drank some water). Now I've woken up and I feel much better... but that doesn't mean I feel good at all. but well, whatever, I had it coming.
I hope it's a cold, though. Hope it isn't some weird thing I contracted while using the toilet... or bird flu! Ah, couldn't be the latter... haven't had chicken since I was in Valencia... plus, I'm not a bird, and Tiny's not around here, so it's all safe.
Anyway, I've slept through the whole day, not having anything to eat, and then the next thing I know is I'm feeling a bit wet. Hmm. Again. WTF? I open my eyes, only to basically feel something around my face (not sure of what it was) and then I see Steve, standing by the door, aiming that fucking water machine gun. The bastard squirt me while I was asleep! He wanted me to go to the Chelsea match with him, but I was just too fucked to go anywhere. It took me a while to get him to leave me alone, but once I got hold of his gun it was quite easy. The cunt.
Yep, I know the last paragraph sounds like quite a sexual encounter, but I really can't be bothered to change it, so enjoy. I just want to say I didn't purposefully write it like that, it just came out. Damn, this fever is making me hallucinate... cool!
posted by Jimmie | 12:18 PM
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